Ale for the Soul

Hope everyone had a very Christ-filled holiday season.  I sure did, even though yours truly wasn't able to spend time with family.  The second best option was to spend a few hours with the men and women of my support group.  We had a great time of fellowship over a hot meal.  I took two to-go plates to friends of mine whom I knew probably didn't have family nearby to help celebrate the season.  Then I spent the remainder of the day in solitude.  On Tuesday I also celebrated my 49th birthday.  Yes, the last year of the age decade is coming to a close.  Not sure how I feel about it as I reflect back on the time spent in my current place of residence.  Why can't I be happy and experience the abundant joy I know is possible through the Lord Jesus?  He has so richly blessed me, yet I often fail to "taste and see that the Lord is good".  Happiness is fleeting, but joy can be had in spite of life's circumstances.  Try as I may, I keep missing the long-sought after co

About a month ago, my mentor and friend passed away from a very aggressive form of cancer.  Thinking it was an issue with his gall bladder, he was shocked to learn it was Stage Four cancer.  Wow, can't imagine how he must have felt to all of a sudden have mortality staring at him in the face.  Shaking my head in disbelief at yet another friend transitioning from this terrestrial sphere to eternity.  Five total in almost three years.  Unfortunately, unlike a few of my other friends, Pat passed away without Jesus.  This makes his death even harder to bear.  Today his family will hold a Celebration of Life service at the Lecture Hall inside the Fort Worth Botanic Gardens.  Since I wasn't able to get off work to attend, I will remember the life of my friend in a special way while on duty at the cigar shop.  A celebratory smoke while enjoying a cup of coffee is in order.  One day soon, I also hope to frequent the coffee shop we would often meet at for times of sharing and accountabl

Happy Thanksgiving and many blessings to one and all.  In the midst of life and the harsh reality of daily living, it is sometimes difficult to get an objective perspective on what's really going on.  Perceptions are created and decisions made contingent on the ebb and flow of the surrounding circumstances.  Experience has taught me this is dangerous as I need to step back for a proper assessment of life predicated on the Scripture of God's Holy Word.  Only the Sovereign Lord has complete knowledge of and infinite wisdom to discern life as we live it out here on earth.  Thanksgiving isn't simply a holiday one day in November...it is a daily lifestyle of true gratitude for God's many blessings and acts of grace and mercy.  More than getting a "want" or having a "need" satisfied, I am truley grateful for those things in life I didn't get, which is what mercy really is.  Grace is getting what I don't deserve.  Mercy is not getting what I do dese

In a week from now, I will begin a 90-day temporary job with Walmart.  As a result, I have been taking advantage of this last week of freedom by travelling and sight seeing.  Last Saturday, I took off on the open road to Dinosaur Valley State Park in Glen Rose.  They had two guided park events I wanted to participate in: Track Talks and a hike to Paluxey Overlook.  The discussion on the dinosaur tracks was very interesting in that I don't personally believe in evolution, which includes a belief in a young earth.  Basically, it is a belief that the earth is only 6,000 to 8,000 years old.  (For more on this, read The Young Earth by Dr. Morris.)  Then Ranger Katie took us on a non-strenuous hike to the overlook, which holds the best scenic view in the park.  Once the two activities had ended, I checked out a few other sites around the park: the Blue Hole, the Monarch butterfly area, and the park store.  After leaving the state park, I immediately headed for the small town of Glen Ros

Last Friday morning I was able to leave town for four days of camping and site-seeing.  The main purpose of the trip was to visit a friend who is incarcerated on the Ellis Unit in Huntsville and then to swing by Palestine for a time of fellowship with a friend who pastors a church in the area.  As a result, camping was simply a form of inexpensive lodging to help accomplish what I wanted to do.  The cost for three nights at Huntsville State Park were still cheaper than one night at any motel/hotel.  Unbelievable, isn't it?!  Of course I still need to factor in the price of gas in travelling and the cost of food and drinks.  I still came out ahead by camping at the park.  In addition to visiting both friends, I was able to take in the historical sites the area had to offer.  First on the list was the Texas Prison Museum.  Utterly fascinating, considering I'm about to visit a local unit where my friend is currently assigned.  Then I visited H.E.A.R.T.S. Veteran's Complex, the

Several more items on my bucket list were marked off last Friday and Saturday.  On September 9th, I travelled to Fort Richardson State Park in order to participate in the ten o'clock tour of what was left of the original outpost.  A few of the buildings were reconstructed represenations of what they would have looked like while a greater majority were original to the time it was an active installation.  Park Ranger Conner performed an excellent job guiding another camper and me throughout the area.  Once we were finished, we chatted inside the incredible Interpretive Center at the forefront of the historic grounds.  At the conclusion of our time together, I immediately set out to discover what the park had to offer.  Two of the hiking trails piqued my interest as I wanted to explore nature at its finest.  To cap off my excurion, I smoked a cigar in the pavillion/playground area.  Discovering a communal firepit, I'm already planning my next trip to include a fire.  Of course I t

Moving here in February of 2010, I had to radically reinvent myself from the former person I was to something totally brand new.  It wasn't a repackaging of the same old stuff, something that a cosmetic new pair of glasses and fake mustache would cover.  A disguise of sorts similar to scenes from corny movies of a bygone era.  For decades I would try to manage the external behavior when what was needed was a drastic change of the heart and soul.  Finally I realized that I had to clean up the inside of who I was and watch the transformation unfold.  Surely the example of a caterpiller to a butterfly is not too overused to cite here.  Still a great analogy!  Once the wreckage of the past had been dealt with, I could move toward total health and wellness in mind, body, heart, and soul.  (Physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual.)  Only then could the changed insides induce moral and honorable external behaviors.  The Gospel of Matthew clearly states that out of the wellspring of the

Recently I had two wonderful dreams about living back home.  In the first one, I was hanging out with my former next-door neighbor and his family in the Clear Lake area of Houston.  The second dream included attending a Bible study with friends from my former church, Northside Baptist, in Victoria.  Unfortunately I had to wake up to the stark reality of my situation, and that is living in the Dallas/Fort Worth metroplex.  I was extremely sad and disappointed.  Dreaming while we sleep can be a lot of fun and refreshing, but having dreams or goals in life can also become invigorating and energize us to reach forward in life.  As I have grown older, the many dreams and life goals have changed.  Some have completely gone by the wayside while others have undergone slight alterations.  Currently my goals are to keep working at the present job which will enable me to move back to Houston.  In addition, I need to pay off a few debts, replenish the savings account, and begin purchasing a few ma

Seasons of life come and go.  Some are warmly remembered while others are quickly forgotten in the rearview mirror of life.  About a month ago I decided to draw a close on working at Big Dave's Cigars in Fort Worth.  In its place I took on a full-time career with Allen Edmonds in Dallas.  While selling shoes may be old hat and the initial career post-High School, I must look back rather nostalgically on the tobacco industry.  Upon moving to Fort Worth in 2010, I couldn't seem to break into the shoe industry in the D/FW Metroplex, even if my life depended on it.  The proverbial "mark of Cain" must have been writ large on my forehead or stamped somewhere on my work history/resume.  As a result, I was forced to pivot and ended up reinventing myself in the cigar and pipe industry.  Twelve years and three cigar shops later, hob-knobbing with the likes of Doc Severinsen, Ron White, and Pat Green to name a few, I am called once again to the art of selling footwear along with

The term bucket list has been around for quite some time, and I have slowly warmed to the concept.  It is essentially a list of experiences or achievements a person desires to accomplish during their lifetime.  My personal list has changed drastically over the years to include fewer "pipe dreams" and replaced with more realistic goals.  Due to age and the never-improving finances, I have stopped seeking advanced degrees and the childhood dream of a career in historical archeaology.  (Please don't think this is giving up on life.  Sometimes I simply need to quit beating my head against the wall of reality.)  As I shift my goals, I continue to gain personal richness through other measures.  This year alone, I have been able to mark off quite a few items on my personal bucket list.  In March I was able to visit Cedar Hill State Park for the very first time.  Since the initial visit, I have become a frequent visitor.  From the First Day of Spring Hike to a lecture on saving

The definition of Existential Depression:  inner conflicts characterized by the impression that life lacks meaning.  Ultimately my identity is in the Lord Jesus Christ, and life's meaning is to have a vibrant and fulfilling relationship with the same Lord.  This is in spite of circumstances swirling around me.  Some may argue reality sucks, but I posit that the spiritual kingdom encompasses the perceived reality of this terrestrial plane.  Reality may "suck" due to a lack of or failing relationship with Yahweh God.  This is where I am in life.  Devoid of ego or a superiorty complex, I recognize the gifts with which God has so richly blessed me.  The challenge is how do these gifts play out horizontally out of the richness of a vertical relationship with one I will call a Higher Power.  So much of my life has been spent in bitterness over lack of resources and opportunities to use the talents, skills, and abilities that are innately bestowed upon yours truly.  A lack of fi

**Found this piece of work in my computer files.  Not sure the purpose for which I wrote this, but I found the content interesting.** “I am four years old!”   This was my first conscious moment of self-awareness as I stood in the front yard of my home in Austin, Texas.   The sun was shining brightly as I stood under the shade of the house eaves, gazing upon the Chinese Tallow Mom had planted years ago.   The shadow it cast almost touched the curb as it made an outlined impression on the green grass of the yard.   That moment of self-remembrance must have been enough for my small mind that day, because I remember little else.   My life must have been in a fog of transition from dependence on others to quasi self-awareness.   At some point in time I made the leap to constant cognizance of the world around me.   There weren’t any more gaps in the course my life would take.   From then on, I remember living in Austin, enjoying the fruits of childhood, and playing with my two friends across

Do you ever think or believe Forest Gump intended to have the extraordinary life he had?  In the movie, he was an extremely fortunate soul who was carried by the winds of life to experience many incredible moments in history.  By the world's standards, he was not a very smart man...or at least not academically.  However, I believe he possessed an intelligence and an innate fortitude to persevere when life didn't make sense or confronted with the great injustices of life.  In no way am I comparing my life to his; however, I do feel some kindred spirit or connection with that fictional character.  All through Junior High and High School, I knew exactly what I wanted to pursue as a career as well as accomplish in the periphery of life.  None of it happened!  Maybe God had other plans for me according to His overarching design.  In the intervening years since that time, I have travelled to places, met people, and experienced situations in life that have greatly added to my personal

On Tuesday, I took out on the open road to Cedar Hill State Park.  From where I live, the park is on Interstate 20 heading East past Arlington and Grand Prairie; in fact, I saw the very southern edge of the Dallas city limits while travelling.  Thank goodness for the map app on my phone, or I may have had difficulty locating this gem nestled in the Metroplex.  A hidden treasure it is!  Unfortunately, I didn't find out till my arrival that the beach area and surrounding grounds were closed due to restoration efforts.  In addition, a portion of the main road was down to one lane for construction.  Still undettered, I resolved to get the most experience out of my adventure.  First on the list was visiting Penn Farm.  The entrance sign suggested the tour would take an hour.  That was spot on, but it sure didn't seem like that long as yours truly was enthralled with the history of the buildings and grounds.  I was equally impressed with the upkeep of what I was seeing.  Kudos to the

The new year is already off to a great start!  On January 4th, I began working at Dunham & Jones law firm in their call center.  It's simply a glorified switchboard operator or receptionist position, but it's right up my alley.  Other than the IT Manager, who oversees the eighteen-plus employees, I'm the only male working in the building.  So far, I've been learning quite a bit and believe the job will work out just fine for the foreseeable future.  In fact, I receive my first paycheck on Monday and benefits kick in on April 1st.  Woohoo!  Employment with the cigar shop has been pushed to the weekends.  This will provide extra money for odds and ends till I get caught up financially.  By no means am I in dire financial need, but I sure could start paying down the credit card balance.  The whole process will take time.  Of course I'm concerned about wearing myself out with no days off or time to myself.  So far, I've been holding up quite well.  Father God is